Online dating is one of the most common ways to meet someone now. It’s convenient and opens up a far wider pool of people — and it comes with its own safety considerations that are worth taking seriously. None of this is meant to scare you off dating; it’s meant to let you do it freely, without handing a stranger more than you meant to. Here’s how to stay safe before, during, and after a date.
Before the Date
1. Don’t give out too much information
A good profile is worth the effort, but so is keeping your personal information to yourself. Dating apps ask about your job, school, and workplace — and it’s surprisingly easy to track someone down with just that plus a first name and a city. Think about whether you actually need those details in your bio or photos, especially if you have an uncommon first name. (Your last name shouldn’t be on your profile at all.)
2. Actually read their profile
Before you get invested in a match, take a minute to look their profile over. Watch for inconsistencies and warning signs: very little information, generic photos, or early pushes for personal details. Trust your read, and don’t feel obligated to keep talking to a profile that gives you pause. If you have friends in common, it’s fair to ask them about the person.
3. Use a reverse image search
If a profile feels off, you can drop the photos into a reverse image search to see where else they appear online. It’s a quick way to catch a catfish using stolen pictures.
4. Keep money out of it
Dating and money don’t mix, full stop. Be wary of anyone who asks for cash, gifts, or “help” with a bill — a very common scam is to build an emotional connection and then use it to ask for money. No CashApp. No Venmo. And definitely no social security numbers.
5. Report suspicious behavior
If someone’s behaving suspiciously or harassing you, report them in the app. The platforms have tools for exactly this, and your report helps keep other people safe too. It’s a team effort.
During the Date
6. Meet in public, at least the first few times
Pick somewhere public and well-lit. Skip private settings — their place for dinner, for instance — for the early meetings, no matter how good a reason they give. And tell a friend where you’ll be and when you expect to be home. (I learned this one the hard way; there’s a story in my own dating lessons about the one time I ignored it.)
7. Keep control of your own way home
Arrange your own transportation there and back. Don’t accept a ride from someone you’ve only just met — and be ready to politely decline if they offer. If there’s drinking involved, use a rideshare or public transit to get home.
8. Trust your instincts
Try it on paper
Free printable dating journal pages — prompts, a red-flags list, and a couple of exercises to try before you commit. Print them, or fill them in on screen.
Pay attention to how you feel as the date goes. If something feels off, wrong, or uncomfortable, you’re allowed to end it — no explanation required. It’s always better to err on the side of caution. Give yourself permission to be awkward rather than unsafe.
9. Stay sober enough to look after yourself
If there are drinks, keep yourself well short of properly drunk. You’ll notice sooner when something feels off, and you’ll be far better able to act on it if you ever need to.
After the Date
10. Don’t ignore how you felt
If you look back and realize you felt uneasy or unsafe at any point, don’t explain it away. Writing down how a date actually felt — while it’s still fresh — makes it much harder to talk yourself into a second one just to check whether the feeling was “nothing.” When it comes to safety, your first read is usually the honest one, and it’s worth having it on the page.
11. Don’t sit with a bad experience alone
If something unpleasant or unsafe happens, you don’t have to carry it by yourself — lean on friends, family, or a professional. Writing about it helps too: getting the experience out of your head and onto the page makes it easier to think clearly about what actually happened and what you want to do next. (Here’s more on how journaling can help your dating life.)
None of this should make dating feel scary. A few sensible precautions are exactly what let you relax into the good parts — meeting new people, having a strange and interesting time, and staying safe while you do it.